How The Orlando Shootings Affected Me Indirectly

This weekend was full of mourning for Christina Grimmie, the 49 individuals who died and the 53 who were injured. My heart hurts in ways that I can’t describe. I have never met these people, and now I won’t get to. All of them were gone too soon, by sick minded people. All an hour away from home.

On Sunday, I saw a person running out of a store. My heart began beating faster and I almost started running too, until I realized he was a kid catching up to his family. I was so scared that another thing was going to happen. That things will continue to go out of hand and people will continue to die for the third day in a row.

Is it selfish of me to think this way? To be afraid, even though I was not personally affected by the events that happened? Maybe I am. But I know I am not the only person who feels this way.

I am in a new state of being constantly aware. I am this tiny little speck in this huge world. I’m just one life. It can be taken so easily by hateful people. We shouldn’t be living in constant fear. We shouldn’t take life lightly. That is what this weekend showed us. Innocent people with so much life ahead of them died for reasons that we will never understand. It makes people feel hopeless and faithless. It makes people feel like there is no good in the world. It shouldn’t be like that. There’s no one at fault, except the shooters. It’s not the government’s fault, because if someone has the intention to kill, they will kill. There are sick people on this planet and there always will be.

Many people feel defeated, including myself. I’ve seen articles saying prayers don’t do anything. But the last thing you should do is to stop having faith and to stop praying. I truly believe that what happened in Orlando is more than just a hate crime. I’ve read countless articles and they only scare me more. I’m terrified for what’s to come within the next month. So, I will never stop praying. I have God in my heart and I know he will protect me. So don’t lose faith or sight of what is important. Stay safe, because nobody knows what can happen next.

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